It has been proven that being surrounded by people who are happy and exude positive energy, instantly makes you feel and be in a better mood. So, what if you could be that person that people would love to be around? The person who makes them feel happier just by being there? What if you could be the one who spreads positivity to everyone around you?
The world is already filled with people nagging about their daily lives, negative news on the TV or newspapers. What people are constantly looking for, what they are searching, is something, someone who can be a ray of sunshine in their lives. Someone who will brighten up their day because it is impossible to resist their smile and happiness, their positive vibes and the way they seem to be in love with life and make those around them fall in love with life as well. How about you being that person for those around you?
Would it not be awesome to be known as that one person that everyone wants to hang out with and be around every day? Would that not be a lot better than being known for being the one who seems to drain people’s energies? That being said, let’s take a look at how you can become the sunshine, the ray of positivity everyone needs in their lives.
How to spread positivity to those around you.
Being a source of positivity and happiness for those around you isn’t as hard as it might sound. Mainly it is about making the conscious choice of being happy and choosing to spread as many positive vibes as possible.
#1: The work starts from within.
“Be happy about your own life and you’ll be amazed at just how much more beautiful you’ll find it to be.” - Temitope Ibrahim
"Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you." - Ralph Marston
In order to spread positivity to those around you, you need to start to work on yourself first. You need to start by changing the way your mind works and you need to learn to train your brain into thinking positive, into smiling, into being grateful, into being in love with your own life.
You need to set your mind to constantly look for the good things that surround you every day and every moment of your life. If you aren’t genuine about this people will most likely notice it. Do it for yourself. Do it to make your life more wonderful. The inspiration for others will automatically follow. If you are at peace with your thoughts and the way you perceive life, others, who come in contact with you, will undoubtedly notice. They won’t be able to resist the positive energies which you will automatically be spreading everywhere you go.
We spoke about the steps which you can follow in order to stop negative thinking in one of our other blog posts. In this article we explained a little more detailed about everything you have to do in order to switch your brain from having negative thoughts to being more focused on the positive things in your life.
#2: Be kind to everyone.
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” - Leo Buscaglia
"You never regret being kind." - Nicole Shepherd
Kindness goes a long way. Not only will others see you in a more positive light, but kindness always finds its way back to those who spread it. It may not be given back to you directly by the person you shared it with, but those who are kind always experience kindness in return. It is like starting a chain reaction, which in the end always somehow comes back to those who started it and keeps going for another round from there onward again. Give it a try, as often as you can. Kind gestures do not always have to be huge gestures. Any kind gesture is welcome. From a kind greeting, to holding the door open for someone else, to giving your seat up in the bus for the elderly lady or the gentlemen with the crutches, lending a helping hand, sharing your lunch, teaching someone else something you are good at, volunteering for a good cause, picking up the trash on the walk way and disposing it into a trash can, the list is endless. Try and you will notice that those around you seem to be more kind to you as well.
Being kind means saying “Please” and “Thank you”, it means treating others with respect, saying “Good morning/Good night” acknowledging them when they are talking, looking at them when having a conversation, giving them your full attention. Just being an overall good and helpful person will make a huge difference. On the one hand for the way you feel about yourself (yes being kind gives us a feeling of inner peace, it puts a smile on our face and makes us feel more content with ourselves) and on the other hand, for those where you magically brought a smile to their faces by being kind to them!
Do someone else’s chores without expecting anything in return, not even letting the person find out it was you. Notice how awesome you will feel afterwards.
Make sure you treat others the way you would like to be treated. People will remember you as a kind, approachable person, which of course is always a nice way to be remembered.
#3: Talk about positive things.
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” - Ashley Smith
“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.” - Alphonse Karr
Sometimes people just want to take their minds off their everyday problems. They have enough worries of their own. They don’t want to keep talking about prices going up or our, unfortunately, way too often negative news on the TV or in the newspaper. Sometimes all they want is to have a light, fun conversation. All they want is to talk about something positive, to listen to something that inspires them, makes them smile, makes them laugh, makes them forget about their own hardships for a moment and reminds them to take things easier again, not to worry so much, to have faith that everything happens for a reason and that if they start being positive the way you are, everything will turn out in a wonderful way.
Be the person that brings fun, positive topics into every conversation. Even if it is just during a mini conversation with a stranger, even when it is only ordering your breakfast at the bakery, be the person who brightens up the day by greeting people with a smile, a joyful “good morning” and a warm “have a wonderful day”. Make people laugh, make them feel happy when they are around you, but most importantly, make them feel like you do care about what they are saying and you’re truly interested in their opinions and stories as well. There’s nothing nicer than engaging in a great, fun conversation with someone! But keep in mind, a good conversation is always created by at least two people. Start the conversation, keep the conversation going, keep it positive but give the other person a chance to speak up as well.
Keep in mind, to not only talk more about positive things but to also focus on using positive language. When trying to implement more positive language it is vital to use as little generalization as possible, especially when expressing feelings that are not so nice (when speaking of negative things in case you can not avoid that).
Try not to use words such as always, never, ever, all etc.
Maybe you are trying to hint at someone else that they are being quite moody today, please, do not tell them they are always grumpy (they will probably go straight into defense mode), words like "always" are very strong words and most of the time they are not accurate. Hardly anyone is really always grumpy.
How about instead of telling them they are grumpy, you ask them what you could do to brighten up their day? How about you smile at them? How about you tell them to smile because they deserve to be happy just as much as anyone else?
This also goes along, with trying not to use stereotypes and prejudice.
Everyone is different, everyone is unique.
Yes you might have met quite an amount of people that appear to have the same habits and come from the same place, have the same hobby etc. BUT no 2 people are exactly the same. So kindly try not to use terms such as XYZ.
It is simply not possible to be true that really ALL of them are like XYZ or "always" do XYZ.
Try to ask yourself before speaking am I going to say something nice? And in case you know you are not, ask yourself if it is really necessary to say what you are planning to say at all...and if you really feel like you have to say it even though it is negative, think of the most positive, kind and still honest way you could possibly express what you are trying to say.
Oh and if you can't think of something positive straight away, try to think of something you are grateful for and start leading the conversation with that.
#4: Always listen to people.
Nowadays everyone wants to be heard, but nobody really wants to listen anymore. That’s why everyone will appreciate it, when you actually take the time to listen to them (repeat to check your understanding clearly what he/she said before responding. This allows him/her to feel valued and at the same time gives you a better understanding of their perspective) and give them great advice! Let them finish their story before giving the advice and choose your words carefully when giving advice. You don’t want them to feel as if they would have to defend themselves or as if you would be judging them.
Even if you are terrible at giving advice or if you just can not come up with any good advice for the particular situation, for them to know that you are someone they can talk to about anything, that you will listen to what they have to say, matters. Let them know, show them, that you are someone who does not mind listening and who if possible will make them see the positive in their situation, who will make them smile again!
A lot of people don’t only need someone to listen to their hardships but more importantly to listen to their happy moments. They want to share their happiness with someone as well. By telling someone else how they felt, they want to feel again how awesome it felt when it happened. They want someone to smile with them. To be happy with them, even if it is just for a moment.
Keep in mind when trying to listen to others more, that it is very important to look at the other person when having a face to face conversation. Most of you will probably follow this advice already, but I keep on meeting people who seem to either have difficulties with this advice or not even be consciously aware of it.
Try to always keep eye contact with the people you speak to, it not only shows respect to the person you speak to but it shows them that you are giving your full attention to the conversation, you are not letting your mind wonder somewhere else meanwhile. Some people might not keep eye contact in a conversation out of shyness, that should not keep you from looking at the person while conversing with them. You never know the reasons other people don' t do it. Don' t judge them but show them by doing so yourself, how much nicer it is.
#5: Don’t hesitate to compliment others.
"The happiness of life is made up of the little charities of a kiss or smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment." - Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Everyone loves compliments if there are meant in an honest way. Do not hesitate to be the one giving out compliments to others. Not only to friends and family, but also to coworkers or strangers. You see something nice, you are most welcome to let them know you think it is great. It may be someone’s hairstyle, it may be someone’s shirt, it may be something someone has done, something someone has achieved, the way they have handled a situation, it can literally be nearly anything. Whatever you like about someone you are welcome to compliment on. Make them feel great about their choice of fashion, their habits, their achievements. Show them how great it is to give or receive compliments. Make them smile.
Did anyone ever tell you how much they value you? How much they believe in you? How awesome you are? Do you remember what it felt like?
If you ever received an honest "present" like that you know, that you will always carry it in your heart. It is one of the nicest, free, presents we can give another person.
Why don' t you give this "present" to someone else today? How about telling someone else how much you believe in them? How about telling someone else how much you value them? Or how awesome they are? TODAY is the perfect day to do so! Let's go brighten up some other peoples days! (after finishing to read this blog-post obviously not before...)
#6: Spread positivity even when you are silent, even when you are not speaking.
"A smile remains the most inexpensive gift I can bestow on anyone and yet its powers can vanquish kingdoms." - Og Mandino
This can be done with sharing a kind smile as mentioned. This can be done with kind acts as mentioned. But this can also be done by wearing clothing with positive statements. Reading a positive statement on a stranger’s bag on the train ride to your way to work can put a smile on your face and make you feel just as great as if someone would have told you whatever was written on that bag/ shirt.
#7: Do something nice for your friends.
By this we don’t necessarily mean getting them expensive gifts every time you see them, but mostly doing something they would really appreciate, that would make them feel loved and cared for.
It can be a text reminding them how much you value them or spending quality time together or simply giving them their favorite candy as a surprise gift for no particular reason at all! It is about the little things you can do in order to brighten up their day and put a smile on their face.
As you might have noticed by now, being a ray of positivity in everyone’s life might take quite a bit of effort, but since it is small things which will make a huge impact on your life as well as other people’s lives, it is not a difficult task. Obviously, if you want people to see you as being the sunshine in their lives, it will take consistency, but consistent effort is not the same as something being difficult. The more often you stick to our advice, the more often you follow our advice, the more easy and natural it will become for you. Being kind is priceless, so is being a source of positivity for others or being a great person to have a conversation with, those are great character traits! Always keep that in mind, always strive to be the ray of positivity people are looking for. Be in love with life, love yourself and being Mr. / Mrs. Sunshine will be the easiest thing you have ever done.